no more tests? really?

Well, I've now officially finished my 19th consecutive year of trying to get educated. The last few weeks have been really surreal in a lot of ways for me - realizing that this is my last class, realizing that I've just finished my last paper, printing off my thesis and sending it off for binding. There have been so many things wrapping up, it leaves me with a really weird feeling.

I guess a lot of it is knowing that I can pull off being a student, but not being as sure about pulling off being a minister. Sure, I've done some stuff that will prepare me, but this is a completely different ballgame than classes. It won't just be a bad grade that I'll get in the future, it'll be someone I've hurt or failed to help. It's made me start taking things more seriously, which is kind of interesting seeing that play out and realizing some of the habits that are keeping me from doing as well as I can (such as msn zone games).

It's also kind of weird thinking about leaving a mark, how I've made some friends that will probably remember me for a while and who I know I will remember. On that same line, the fact that my thesis is going to be put in the library is still just bizarre, and I'm not sure I'll ever get used to the idea that someone can look up my name and get a book-like item out of one of the largest theological libraries in the world. Maybe I've been a little contemplative, thinking about the things I didn't do that I hoped to and the things that I hope to do in the future. Balancing taking things seriously while also not taking them too seriously is not something I'm very good at, and hopefully I can work on that in the coming month before we move. I imagine, however, that it'll probably be a longer process than just a month. Here's to figuring that out.

Peter